Friday, July 22, 2011

Green Lantern flickers

Although I've decided to confront the fact of my disease in this blog, that's not all I'll be blogging about. I also won't shy away from the fact that I've made extremely bad decisions about other things. Such as going to see Green Lantern of my own free will.

I've never known what to make of Green Lantern as a superhero. Conceptually, he always struck me as better villain material -- especially with that whole charging the ring with a Coleman knockoff from Big Five and a "Power Oath" that smacked obscurely of some type of cryptofascistic dialectic. Not only that, but he had a ridiculous weakness -- he was powerless over the color yellow. Even in childhood I knew that you made green by mixing blue and yellow, so it seemed to me that this could've been thought out better.

Of course, even the Silver Age Green Lantern's jaundiced view of the color yellow paled against the absurd limitation of the power ring worn by the Golden Age Green Lantern. His was powerless over anything made of wood. That's right -- wood. (I don't know if this includes plywood or wood-grain plastic.) I'm thinking of stopping by the drugstore, picking up a box of number 2 pencils and making 'em both my bitches.

As for the movie ... Save your money for Captain America. With the madness going on in Washington currently, it's likely the closest you'll ever get to seeing what this country might've been ...

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